literature

What Hurts The Most...

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Literature Text

The rain pounded relentlessly against the roof of the small house, the storm clouds blocking out any hope of sunny weather. The sky let out an angry crack of thunder, startling a squirrel hiding in a tree nearby. The noise faded out, leaving the rain to continue to drench the world below.

Gerard sighed, plopping down onto the couch and turning on the T.V. and taking a gulp from a can of beer. He flipped through the channels carelessly, not able to focus on anything in particular. After awhile, he stopped on the news channel and listened about a drug bust in a nearby high school. He finished off the beer and tossed it on the floor, remembering he was working the late shift at Zaxby’s and was to leave soon. The band had taken a small break from touring, Ray, Bob, and Mikey all going in separate directions. Frank and Gerard decided to stay in a house and be roommates, supposedly to save money, but really because they couldn’t stand to be apart from each other for long. Right now, Frank was probably at his job at the tattoo parlor, also a place he likes to stay when he and Gerard get into fights.

Gerard slowly got up from the couch and headed into his and Frank’s room to find his uniform, oblivious to the Emergency Newsflash playing on the T.V.

~

Gerard opened the door and stepped out into the cold, wet rain, neglecting to grab an umbrella. He shut and locked the door behind him and ran out to his car, fumbling for the right key. Finally, he finds it and jams it into the lock. His clothes are soaked by the time Gerard makes it into the car, but he doesn’t care. His mind is focused on other things.

He pulls out of the driveway and speeds off down the wet road, not expecting what lies ahead.

~

(Gerard’s POV)

Damn, my head hurts. I should’ve just called in sick. And to make things worse, I’m soaking wet and I’m feeling guilty as hell about this mornings fight with Frankie. He looked so angry when he stormed out, slamming the door behind him hard enough to shake the house. Worse of all…

I see a bunch of flashing lights through the rain on the road ahead. I groan, knowing I’ll be late for work now just because some idiot couldn’t drive right in the ra--

Wait…I…I think I recognize that car…oh my god, it couldn’t be…Frankie!?

I stop the car suddenly once I see the license plate. It was Frank’s car. His now mangled and crushed car. I practically leapt out of the car, rushing over to where they were prying off the side door of Frank’s car which had been crushed inward. I stared, wide-eyed in horror, the sinking feeling in my chest growing with every second that passes.

“Sir, please step back.” Came a gruff voice behind him. I jumped, turning to see it was a fireman.

“B-b-but that’s my best friend in there!” I managed to say. The fireman stared at me, and nodded. “W-w-what happened?”

“Apparently, your friend was going through the intersection when a speeding semi ran through the redlight and plowed straight into his car.” The fireman replied, and hurried over to help the others pull the door off. I stood, frozen in place, absorbing what he had just told me. But I snapped out of it when I heard the door of the car being jerked off its hinges, revealing what was inside.

What I saw will haunt my memories forever.

So much blood…everywhere…

Frank…so bloody…his arm and leg facing me seeming to be completely crushed…his head baring a large gash which poured fresh blood.

The paramedics rush over with the stretcher, lowering it to the ground as they started to pry Frank out from the car. The steering wheel had been pushed down, slicing into Frank’s other, uncrushed leg, making him stuck in the metal prison. I want to throw up…to run away…but I can’t leave Frank here.

They finally get Frank out of the car and onto the stretcher, further revealing his injured body. His head rolled from side to side, eyes fluttering. He was muttering something, blood dripping from the corners of his mouth as he spoke, but his voice was weak so I couldn’t make it out.

“Frankie!” I yelled, running after the paramedics as they rushed him into the ambulance. Frank opened his eyes enough to see me, lifting his hand toward me desperately just as they shut the doors. They wouldn’t let me in, so I watched as the ambulance sped away in a flurry of sirens and flashing lights. For a moment I just stood there in a daze, not sure if this was really happening. The sky let out a thunderclap overhead, causing me to snap out of it. I quickly rushed back to my car, cranking it up and sped off toward the hospital before I could even close the door.

~

(Frank’s POV)

Wha…what’s happening? Where am I? I hear…sirens. Who are these people around me? Am I…in an ambulance? But Gerard was just there…

Oh god, the pain. It hurts like hell. Pure agony. Pure fucking agony. I can’t feel my left arm and leg, but everything else feels like it’s being electrocuted with thousands of knives. I managed to get a glimpse of my body and almost scream in horror. This can’t be my body. No. It looks more like a bloody ragdolls. Not mine.

Everything is getting fuzzy…I can’t see…I’m so dizzy, so weak…everything is getting dark…

Oh fuck…it’s that light…

                                                                               That light at the end of the tunnel.

~

(Gerard’s POV)

The insistant ticking of that clock is going to drive me fucking nuts. The entire band is here, sitting in the waiting room for news of Frank. It’s only been a few minutes, but it seems like years I’ve been here, waiting and waiting. Oh, please Frank…

We all jump as the doctor enters the waiting room, looking solemn. We all stared at his lab coat and gloves that were stained a bright red. He stared at us, and sighed.

“He sustained severe injuries,…fatal injuries. I’m afraid he doesn’t have much longer.” The doctor says. My heart feels like it has just been crushed by a three ton weight. I can’t breathe. This can’t be happening…

“Come with me.” The doctor said, and started toward Frank’s hospital room. We all get up, knowing every second counts, and follow the doctor through the door into the room.

~

Frank was lying on the hospital bed, various tubes stuck in his arms that lead to strange machines that beeped constantly. He had an oxygen mask over his face, leaving his shut eyes as the only thing that clearly showed. Blood covered the sheets around him, giving the look of the room as that of a murder scene.

“Oh god…Frank…” someone said. I think it might have been Mikey, but I wasn’t paying attention. I slowly walked over and kneeled beside Frank, taking his hand. He winced and opened his eyes weakly, immediately brightening when he saw my face.

“G..Ger…” he struggled to say, but coughed before he could finish it.

“Shh…” I managed to whisper. He groaned, turning his head so he was able to see everyone in the room. He rolled his head back at me, tears in his eyes.

“It…it hurts…so bad, Gee…” Frank choked. I squeezed his hand tighter, the others gathering around closer as they realized what was happening. The heart monitor started to go slower and slower, and so did his breathing.

“I…love you…Gerard…” Frank managed to say, smiling painfully. Tears blur my vision, spilling down my face like a waterfall. I tried to form words, but my voice wouldn’t work. Frank suddenly gasped, and falls limp, his hand stops gripping mine.His eyes shut, never to open again. I hear the heart monitor flat line, and someone burst out crying…I think it was me.

Then I realized…I didn’t even get to tell him I loved him too.

~

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house,
That don’t bother me.
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out,
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while,
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me.
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok,
But that’s not what gets me…


It’s been a year since that fateful day, but it only seems like yesterday. I have been living my life in a daze, too consumed by guilt and sorrow to be happy. I cried every day, every night. I would sit and stare at your guitar for hours on end, only to end up sobbing uncontrollably as I imagined you sitting there, smiling and strumming away.

What hurts the most,
Was being so close,
And having so much to say,
And watching you walk away.
And never knowing,
What could have been,
And not seeing that loving you,
Is what I was tryin’ to do…


Finally, I started taking pills the doctor prescribed. They dulled the pain, but didn’t get rid of it.


Touring starts again, and I pull my suitcase onto the tour bus. I walk past your bunk, pausing as a wave of depression washes over me, zapping my strength. I drop my suitcase and fall to my knees, curling up in a ball and start to cry. Someone finds me, and tries to comfort me. It was Mikey. But no matter how hard he tried, it wouldn’t work.

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go,
But I’m doin’ It.
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone,
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret,
But I know if I could do it over,
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart,

That I left unspoken…


I finally picked myself up and run past Ray and Bob, hurrying off the tour bus and running back to the house. I open the door, shut it behind me and lock it tight. Slowly, I walk into Frank and my room, opening the bedside desk drawer. In it lays a pistol I have been saving for this special occasion. I pick it up carefully, listening to the frantic beating and yelling at the front door.

“Gerard! Let us the fuck in!” Bob’s voice rings out. I ignore them and shut the bedroom door, locking it too. I raise the gun to the side of my head, finger on the trigger. I recall the last words I ever said to you…the day we had the fight.


“Gerard! I told you to stop fucking drinking!” Frank yelled.

“I can do whatever the fuck I want!” I yelled back, downing another beer. Frank fumed, and stormed toward the door. He pulled it open and stopped before disappearing out of it.

“Fuck you.” He spat.

“Fuck you, too.” I yelled back at him as he slammed the door. I slung the beer can across the room in rage, listening as Frank’s car speed off.
</b>


What hurts the most,
Is being so close,
And having so much to say,
And watching you walk away.
And never knowing,
What could have been,
And not seeing that loving you,
Is what I was trying to do…


His bloody, mangled body flashes into my brain, making me gasp as the painful memories grip my chest like a grape vine.

“Oh god…I’m so sorry…I never ment for it to come out this way…” I sob, jumping as I heard the front door burst open. Hurried footsteps came closer to the bedroom door. Someone started to ram it when they realized it was locked, giving me only a few moments to finish the deed.

What hurts the most,
Was being so close,
And having so much to say,
And watching you walk away.
And never knowing,
What could have been,
And not seeing that loving you,
Is what I was trying to do.

Not seeing that loving you,
That’s what I was trying to do…


“I love you too, Frankie.”

Bang.
Rating: PG-13 for language, mild gore, and suicide
Main Characters: Gerard Way, Frank Iero
Background Characters: Mikey Way, Bob Bryar, Ray Toro
Pairings: FrankxGeard
Song Inspiration: What Hurts The Most - Rascal Flatts

A/N
Ok yes, it's a very sad fanfic, but it came to me when I was listening to that song and refused to leave me alone until I wrote it. And so, after about...3 hours of typing it, this is the result.
The lyrics to the song are usually in italics, so...yeah. I recommend you listen to What Hurts The Most while reading this and you'll get the right feeling.
Forgive me, Frankie ;_;



Gerard, Mikey, Frank, Ray, Bob (c) Themselves

What Hurts The Most lyrics (c) Rascal Flatts

Story Idea by meh~
© 2007 - 2024 TheVampiricNazi
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That1ChicUHate's avatar
Oh my Lord, shitting down my neck, shitting down my spine, Jesus Christ that was emotional!!